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Editorial
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MY LANDLORD'S LITTLE HOOTIE
Oscar Wilde wrote "Sometimes it requires great courage to give into temptation". I never felt these or any other words so abysmally as that first night in my new apartment. Even the walls seemed permeated with paranoia and guilt. These emotions had nothing to do with giving up my home or my husband divorcing me for a wealthy woman.
Unpacking a box containing cocktail forks and feminine hygiene spray, and needle nose pliers somehow gave me the incentive to confront this crazy psychosis. The big bother was that I didn't want to be bothered unpacking this maze of boxes containing things I didn't even remember owning. I needed pleasure in my life. I knew the need would be satisfied if I could only summon the courage to give into the temptation, go into the bathroom and fiddle around with my landlord's little HOOTIE. In a slow, yet steady fashion, positive logic began to take over. Why couldn't I have some fun? It wasn't as if the landlord and I were strangers. I'd known him for well over a decade. So after a few more deep breaths, I summoned the courage to ignore the mess, close the bathroom door, and do a little fun fiddling.
What a disappointment! His little hootie had a sleeve protecting and covering the important, shinny part. It was an anachronism.--something erected from another era. Craving ecstasy, I began to twist it right and left, up and down until the fore shield got pushed all the way back and things went off in all directions. There was nothing I could do except call his wife and confess everything.
Within ten minutes she was at my door carrying an adorable pink tool box. Without a word, she went directly into the bath room, connected my shower massage and left with a warning not to ever fool around with anything which according to God and Texas Law belonged to her. I gave my word not to and for the next half hour or at least until the hot water ran out I had the most invigorating and erotic shower of my life.
Rather than let the pleasure end, I held onto to the glow.--knowing this perspective was a sure fire way of receiving ideas for turning something I dreaded doing into something that was fun. I pasted a bow on every box containing things I hadn't used within the past six months, called and invited everyone I knew to a wine, cheese, and grab bag party. Everyone had to take at least two boxes home. Any boxes left we set next to the curb with a sign reading "Take Me". Everyone said it was the most fun party we had ever had. The glowing energy stayed with us for days. It was then I realized that gaining a positive quality of life has more to do with what we remove than what we add to it. This of course, takes us into our success enhancement program.
TO WONDER AT NOTHING WHEN IT HAPPENS;
TO CONSIDER NOTHING IMPOSSIBLE BEFORE IT HAS COME TO PASS.
Before you begin to wonder how these zany double entendres are in any way analogous with learning how make Cicero's immortal words a part of our everyday life. STOP!!! And, for about three minutes remember that the meanest people on the planet are the ones who for one morbid reason or another have taken a vow denying all pleasure in this life. Then, take another three minutes and realize that they are emotionally, spiritually, and financially bankrupt. There is nothing wrong with pleasure. It's necessary for the full free happy expression of that allegorical little hootie harbored within us. Without it we are also dirt poor.--not just with money, but with health, love, and joy. Remember it's the stuff we get rid of instead of the stuff we add that improves the positive quality of life. No one at the party wondered or considered it impossible to get settled in a new apartment, get rid of excess junk, and give a super party all in one night? It just seemed to happen naturally. The enthusiastic pleasure glow energy stayed with us throughout the upcoming week. At this point we want the magical energy. How do we go about getting it? All we need is the courage to relax and allow the healing glow to inundate our being. I call it fiddling around with your little hootie. Joseph Campbell calls it following your bliss. Whatever we call it all we need is an uninterrupted half hour each day. Some people take a walk, some find a quiet room and travel in their mind to a private Shan-gri-la or, just love their thought forms.-- for me it was a crazy shower gadget with plenty of hot water. The only rule is that for this half hour our total being experiences a glowing pleasure. Once the half hour is up, we keep the glow, bring it with us into whatever task is awaiting our attention.
The beautiful part is by doing this the office grouch suddenly begins to smile. A pile of paper work gets done in record time and the list goes on and on. Keeping the glow may require a bit of practice at first. And, if you feel you just can't get it on your own; have no fear!! Just give us a call and as for help. There is no charge for the service but we must charge for our time.
In the light of a thousand suns,
Rachel
